I (33F) discovered several years ago that my ex-husband (35M), the father of our two children (11 and 9), had been having an affair with a coworker I'll call "Dana" (30F).
When I confronted him and ended our marriage, he did everything he could to convince me to take him back. During those conversations, he repeatedly spoke negatively about Dana, insisting that their relationship had meant nothing to him. He claimed he loved me and our children and wanted our family back together.
None of it changed my decision.
I also didn't feel sorry for Dana because she knew he was married. She had met me, knew about our children, and still chose to continue the relationship. From my perspective, she knowingly participated in breaking apart my family, so I didn't feel any obligation to warn her about the things my ex was saying behind her back.
Throughout our divorce, my ex continued asking me to reconcile.
The night before our divorce was finalized, he sent another series of messages begging me to stop the proceedings so we could rebuild our family. Once again, he spoke disrespectfully about Dana while trying to convince me to return.
I ignored every message.
By that point, I had completely moved on from the marriage.
After the divorce, my ex moved in with Dana.
From the very beginning, she seemed determined to make my life difficult.
She frequently insulted my appearance, mocked me for being a mother, and made cruel comments suggesting that my ex had left because I was no longer attractive.
I refused to engage.
Her behavior became so inappropriate that she was removed from my children's school on multiple occasions after making insulting remarks in front of staff and other parents.
For years, I chose to stay silent and avoid conflict.
Recently, however, she became even more aggressive.
She began mocking the fact that I had remained single since the divorce, claiming it proved that no one wanted to be with me and insisting my ex had only ever wanted her.
That was the moment I finally responded.
I sent her screenshots of several messages my ex had sent me during and after our separation—messages where he repeatedly spoke negatively about her while asking me to take him back.
I simply told her that if she truly wanted to know how he felt about her, she should read his own words.
She became furious.
She accused me of being cruel and manipulative and questioned why I had never shared those messages years earlier.
I told her I didn't owe her anything.
She knowingly entered a relationship with a married man, fully aware that he had a wife and children.
I explained that I had spent years ignoring her insults while she repeatedly tried to humiliate me, and that I had finally decided to defend myself.
I also reminded her to pay attention to the dates on the messages so she could see exactly when they had been sent.
Since then, she's continued sending me messages.
Because of our custody agreement, I can't completely block her in case there's an emergency involving the children.
Instead, I mute the conversation whenever the kids are with me and only unmute it while they're staying at their father's house.
AITA for finally showing her what my ex-husband was saying about her all along?
Co-parenting after divorce often requires clear communication, healthy boundaries, and emotional maturity from everyone involved. Family disputes, relationship conflicts, and parenting responsibilities can become even more complicated when trust has been broken, making respectful communication and focusing on the children's well-being especially important.
Social Plugin