Am I overreacting?
I’m currently 35 weeks pregnant, and both my 21-month-old son and I came down with a stomach virus this week that’s caused vomiting and diarrhea. I’m completely exhausted from the pregnancy, I’m anemic, I can barely keep food down, and despite all of that, I’ve still been taking care of my toddler while my husband works from home.
My husband and I sleep in separate bedrooms because he snores very loudly and I’m an extremely light sleeper. I also co-sleep with our son because lifting him in and out of his crib several times every night has become far too difficult this late in pregnancy. My son has never consistently slept through the night, and because of placenta-related complications, my obstetrician has specifically instructed me to avoid lifting him whenever possible.
Before all of this happened, my husband promised he would gradually start taking over nighttime care so our son could get used to sleeping in his own crib before the baby arrives. Once our daughter is born, I already know I’ll be handling every nighttime feeding because I plan to breastfeed. The idea was that he would take responsibility for our toddler while I cared for the newborn.
Instead, every single time it's his turn, there's another excuse.
He's too tired.
He didn't sleep well the night before.
He has an important meeting in the morning.
He doesn't want to catch the stomach virus because I'm already sick.
Or there's some other reason why he can't help.
Meanwhile, I'm 35 weeks pregnant, dealing with constant heartburn, round ligament pain, hip pain, back pain, and barely finding a comfortable position to sleep in. Even under those circumstances, I'm still expected to handle every overnight wake-up by myself.
My OB-GYN has also warned me that because of my anemia, pregnancy complications, and the amount of physical stress my body is already under, dehydration and prolonged exhaustion could increase the likelihood of needing additional medical monitoring before delivery. After spending most of the night caring for a sick toddler while barely eating or drinking myself, I started worrying less about missing sleep and more about whether I was pushing my body beyond what my doctor considers safe this close to my due date. Hearing those medical concerns made me realize just how important it is for me to have support at home during these final weeks of pregnancy.
Last night was especially difficult.
My son woke up multiple times because of diarrhea. I had to change him three separate times throughout the night and got up another four times just to give him Pedialyte and make sure he stayed hydrated. Between caring for him, constantly climbing in and out of bed despite my doctor's restrictions, and trying to manage my own pregnancy discomfort, I barely slept at all.
This morning I woke up with an incredibly stiff neck, sore back, aching hips, and complete exhaustion from another sleepless night.
Feeling completely overwhelmed, I texted my husband and explained how physically and emotionally exhausted I was. I told him I desperately needed more help because I genuinely felt like I couldn't keep doing everything alone.
His response absolutely broke my heart.
I didn't even answer.
I simply walked into another room where no one could see me and cried.
Whenever I become upset during this pregnancy, I'm often told that I'm "just emotional" because of hormones.
So now I'm questioning myself.
Am I really being overly emotional and dramatic?
Or am I genuinely being left to carry almost the entire physical and emotional load on my own while approaching the final weeks of pregnancy?
Is this normal behavior from husbands during pregnancy...
...or is my situation actually different?
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