AITA for Telling a Woman at My Gym to Leave Me Alone After She Kept Confronting Me?

I work out at the same gym several times a week, and about six months ago I started noticing a woman I'll call Andrea.

I don't actually know if she had just joined the gym or if that was simply the first time I happened to notice her.

For full context, I was the first person to speak between us, but it wasn't anything personal or flirtatious.

One day I got on a treadmill and realized the built-in television wasn't working. Andrea happened to be walking by, so I asked if she knew whether there was a problem with the gym's cable service or if it was only my machine.

She replied that the same thing had happened on another machine.

I thanked her, and that was the entire conversation.

About a week later, she approached me and asked if I had any electrolyte powder she could add to her water.

I didn't, but we ended up talking for a few minutes.

She asked how long I'd been coming to the gym and what I did for work.

I answered her questions, asked a few in return, and she told me she had recently moved to the area and worked in private security.

Over the following weeks we had several friendly, casual conversations whenever we happened to see each other.

About six weeks ago, she asked me out.

For personal reasons, I wasn't interested in dating anyone, so I politely declined.

She told me not to worry because things didn't have to become awkward at the gym just because I wasn't interested.

I appreciated that and explained my decision had nothing to do with her personally—I simply wasn't looking to date.

Even after that conversation, she continued approaching me regularly.

At first I continued chatting with her, but eventually I began feeling uncomfortable and started avoiding interactions whenever possible.

Two weeks ago she approached me while I was using a weight machine.

Because of the way the machine was positioned, I couldn't easily get off without stepping directly toward where she was standing.

She asked if I had been avoiding her.

I admitted that I had and apologized.

I explained again that I simply wasn't interested in dating.

She replied that I didn't need to avoid her just because I wasn't interested in a relationship.

I said I understood.

Even so, I continued keeping my distance because it felt like the healthiest option for me.

A short time later she confronted me again while I was working out.

I'd already had a difficult day, and when she approached me again, I finally asked her to leave me alone.

She responded by asking why I was being rude.

I told her it was because I wanted her to stop approaching me.

I also said she was embarrassing herself by continuing to pursue the conversation after I'd already made my feelings clear.

At that point, she placed her foot on top of the weight stack while I was still using the machine.

For a moment I thought she was about to interfere with the movement of the weights, so I immediately let go of the bar.

The weight stack slammed down loudly, drawing the attention of several people nearby.

She looked at me and said,

"Now who's embarrassing himself?"

Then she walked away.

I couldn't stop wondering whether I had gone too far by telling her she was embarrassing herself and whether I owed her an apology.

Update

The following morning, I went to the gym early for a run and informed the front desk about what had happened with the weight machine because I felt it had become a safety issue.

They told me they would speak with her.

Later that day, I returned for my regular workout.

While I was training, Andrea approached me again.

The first thing she did was apologize for what happened with the weights.

I don't know whether that was because the staff had spoken with her or because she decided to apologize on her own.

I accepted her apology and apologized for my comment about her embarrassing herself.

She said she forgave me and suggested that, to completely move past everything, we should go out for a drink together.

I politely declined.

I explained that I would rather we simply go our separate ways.

She misunderstood what I meant and started asking when and where we would meet.

I clarified that I wasn't interested in going out together at all.

She said it wouldn't be a date and described it as a chance to reset our friendship.

I told her that I wasn't interested in being friends either.

She became frustrated and asked what my problem with her was.

I explained that the incident with the weight machine had made me uncomfortable and that I genuinely preferred if we simply gave each other space moving forward.

She then asked whether my issue with her was because she is Hispanic.

That completely surprised me because I hadn't even known her ethnicity until she mentioned it.

I told her absolutely not and explained that my discomfort had nothing to do with her background.

She asked me to explain exactly why she made me uncomfortable, but every explanation I offered turned into another argument.

Eventually, I became frustrated and simply asked her to stay away from me.

She responded by saying I had a lot of growing up to do before walking away.

I'm hoping that was the end of the situation.

AITA for asking someone at my gym to leave me alone after repeatedly making it clear that I wasn't interested in dating or continuing a friendship?

Respecting personal boundaries, clear communication, and maintaining a safe environment in shared public spaces are important for everyone. Whether in a gym, workplace, or other social setting, accepting rejection gracefully, respecting personal space, and avoiding repeated unwanted interactions help create a more comfortable and respectful environment for all involved.