I'm 98.7% sure that I am not the AH here, but I'm wrong I'm willing to admit it and learn from my mistakes.
Our little boy will be one late this summer, so this was the first mothers day and fathers day for both me and my husband. My husband asked what I wanted for mothers day. I didn't want/need anything big or expensive. What I asked for is:
Between morning and afternoon naps we have about 4 hours of awake time. The zoo is abt 30 min away so I had figured if we left as soon as he got up from his nap and ate, we'd have a couple hours at the zoo and worst case he could sleep in the car on the way home.
"...husband could go over and help for a couple hours and then come pick us up to go to the zoo."
I was obviously not happy but she guilted him and said FIL was going to end up hurting himself if he moved all that by himself and that its not a big deal and should only take an hour or two.
"...husband called and said they weren't done but he was getting ready to come home."
At that point we'd missed the window to make it to zoo so I told him to just stay there and finish and not worry about Mothers Day since he hadn't done a single thing I asked for.
🏠 The Aftermath
I ended up staying home and ordering a pizza and binging Netflix.
I was still pissed and told him he could make it up by not ruining my first mothers day. I also told him he should plan on spending Fathers Day with his mom and dad bc me and the little guy were going to go celebrate Fathers Day with my mom and dad.
Since Mothers Day MIL has been texting and calling but I've been keeping conversations short and just giving very bland generic responses.
It was my first ever Mothers day. And it's not like I asked for anything expensive or difficult.
I'm not sure what if anything my husband did for his dad. I know he was getting a lot of texts during the day, I assume from his mom.
💭 Emotional Reflection
I know my husband was hurt that we didn't acknowledge him for Fathers Day but I told him while we were driving to my parents house that I'm just matching his energy. I admit that I haven't done anything to de-escalate the drama but I'm still just so hurt he continues to prioritize his mom's feeling over our little family.
This isn't the first time his mom has done crap like this and I'm just so tired of it. She always oversteps and insists on doing what SHE wants. I'm doing better at keeping her at arms length and holding my own boundries but
I'm not sure what if anything my husband did for his dad. I know he was getting a lot of texts during the day, I assume from his mom.
One-line setup for community reaction
Sounds like MIL overstepped big time.
It's your special day, you should be able to celebrate it the way you want.
Your husband needs to set boundaries with his mom for your sake.
Mixed responses and key themes from reactions.
🌱 Final Thoughts
Reflective takeaway; 2–3 sentences
It's important to prioritize each other in a relationship, especially on special occasions.
What do you think?
Would you have left, or stayed and kept trying to make it work? Share your thoughts below 👇
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